HAPPY THURSDAY TO THE STREET
Tomorrow, something may change about how you read The Street Sheet.
The word “may” is doing the heavy lifting in that sentence: the choice is up to you. And it won’t change what’s in your inbox. Just what isn’t.
Apologies for the riddle. The last thing we need right now is more uncertainty… but we just couldn’t wait to share.
More on that tomorrow. In the meantime, we’ll counterbalance it with some clarity. Here’s everything that moved the markets today, made simple, per usual.
🟩 | US stocks extended yesterday’s sharp relief rally with a modest gain, pushing the DJIA into the green on the year, as investors took a cautiously optimistic stance on the US-Iran ceasefire.
📈 | One Notable Gainer: Brown-Forman (BF.B) surged on reports that privately-owned beverage firm Sazerac approached the distilleries company about a potential M&A deal.
📉 | One Notable Decliner: Atkins-owner Simply Good Foods (SMPL) tumbled after its latest earnings fell well short of Wall Street estimates.
— Brooks & Cas
MARKET SNAPSHOT
S&P 500 Heatmap. Credit: Unusual Whales
WHO WILL BE THE MASTERS CHAMPION?
Round 1 of the Masters is underway at Augusta National, and Amazon (AMZN) Prime Video is carrying live coverage for the very first time. As for who wins the green jacket, prediction markets say: shrug.
Official World Golf Ranking leader Scottie Scheffler paces the field at just over $0.20 on the dollar, which means the field is as wide open as the back nine on a Sunday. If you have your high-conviction bets, now’s the time to get them in.
Market Movers
AMAZON, CLOUDFLARE, META
📈 | Amazon’s pharmacy division announced same-day delivery of Eli Lilly’s (LLY) oral GLP-1 pill Foundayo in more than 3,000 cities.
📉 | Cloudflare (NET) fell as Anthropic's rollout of Claude Managed Agents weighed on software stocks for a second straight session.
📈 | Meta Platforms (META) launched its first major new AI model in over a year and committed $21B to CoreWeave’s (CRWV) AI infrastructure.
📉 | GitLab (GTLB) was cut to Neutral at Guggenheim, citing AI risk and slower net revenue retention.
📈 | Staar Surgical (STAA) popped more than 25% after guiding for Q1 revenue well above analyst estimates.
Tomorrow's Trade Idea, Today
COF IT UP
Stock Spotlight
Worth the Wait
Capital One has taken a beating in 2026. JPMorgan has seen enough.
Analyst Richard Shane upgraded the stock to Overweight, arguing the selloff has finally created the entry point he was watching for.
Shane had been monitoring the name since Capital One completed its purchase of Discover Financial Services, waiting for the valuation to come in.
According to the firm, that wait is over.
Well Reserved
Shane's bull case centers on Capital One's balance sheet. JPMorgan believes the company remains well reserved, which should limit the risk of further reserve builds even if macro conditions worsen.
The consumer is under real pressure. Higher energy prices, above-target inflation, and a murky labor market are all headwinds Shane names. But he thinks Capital One can absorb them.
All In on COF
Shares are deep in the red for the year, and the revised price target reflects Shane's caution on the consumer outlook.
But JPMorgan's view is that the bad news is priced in. Capital One bet big on Discover. Now JPMorgan is betting big on Capital One.
Do you own any shares of Capital One (COF)?
OVERHEARD ON THE STREET
📊 | February core PCE, the Fed’s preferred inflation gauge, held steady at 3% while Q4 2025 GDP was revised down to a 0.5% annualized rate, deepening stagflation concerns ahead of tomorrow’s CPI release.
At least 4%: 54%
At least 4.5%: 45%
At least 5%: 35%
⚖️ | The Justice Department opened an investigation into whether the NFL engaged in anticompetitive tactics around its TV rights deals.
🎬 | Disney (DIS) plans to lay off up to 1,000 employees, mostly from its marketing department, the first major cost-cutting move under its new CEO.
🪖 | The Selective Service System plans to automatically register all American men ages 18 to 26 for a potential military draft by December.
🤖 | Michael Burry says Anthropic is capturing 73% of new enterprise AI spending and growing faster than Palantir (PLTR) ever did.
WEDNESDAY’S POLL RESULTS
Do you own any shares of Palo Alto Networks (PANW)?
▇▇▇▇▇▇ 🐂 Yup, I’m holding
▇▇▇▇▇▇ 🐻 Nope, not interested
▇▇▇▇▇▇ 👀 No, but I’m interested
And, in response, you said:
🐂 Yup, I’m holding — “And may be adding...”
🐻 Nope, not interested — “I don’t understand the underlying business enough to feel confident investing in it.”
